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Advent Calendar Last Day
Motherhood

Advent Calendar Fail: Teaching Your Child About Instant Gratification

December 1st rolled around this year and all of a sudden it hit me like a freight train:  I have a child who is now old enough to start appreciating the magic of Christmas and I am woefully unprepared.  We don’t have any decorations or presents yet.  We haven’t made cards.  And finally, we have no Advent calendar.  And while the other stuff will happen eventually as we work our way into the festive season over the next couple of weeks, if the Advent calendar didn’t start it on Dec 1st, well, we might as well abandon the thing.  Note, it’s not like we have some long-standing Advent calendar family tradition I was in danger of breaking.  I just thought it would be a nice thing for us to do every day in the build up to Christmas.

This is why, at the last-minute, on the afternoon of December 1st, I decided to make an Advent calendar.  Yes, make an Advent calendar.  Sure I could run to the shop and pick up one of those calendars with the little chocolate pieces in each day, but the Little Monkey doesn’t like chocolate (how is he related to me??).  I couldn’t see him being excited about that each morning.  But something that has a bunch of small little toys?  That he’d love (well, what kid wouldn’t?).  Then, as I’m surfing the Internet, I come across all of these crafty ideas for Advent calendars.  And I think to myself, OK I can do that.

My plan involved some paper cups, glitter glue, construction paper, and ribbon.  Most of this we, remarkably, already had at home.  For each day, I put a small toy inside a cup.  Then, I made tops for each with the construction paper and glitter glue and then tied them onto the cups with ribbon.

Advent Calendar Cups

And then I hung them all on a small little table top tree we had. It was brilliant.

Advent Calendar Tree

That is until we got the Little Monkey to open the one for December 1st.  Well, once he found out he had twenty-five cups full of little toys and he could reach them, that was it.  It’s one of those decision points that you have as a parent.  Do you stick to the principle of this thing and try to reason with your screaming two-year old about why he can’t have these little trinkets or do you just give in and let him have them.  What did we do?  Well, we decided to just let him dig in and open then all in one go.  Advent calendar done.  Just like that.

Although he is learning about the magic of Christmas, he’s still too young to really understand what it’s fundamentally all about.  And trying to force that on him at the age of two just seemed a bit much.  We’ve got plenty of time to teach him about the meaning of Christmas.  And plenty of Christmas seasons for me to be more prepared.  This year, teaching him about the magic of instant gratification seemed like a better idea.

December 6, 2011
Welcome to Ocado
Motherhood

How to Prevent Toddler Tantrums in the Grocery Store: Just Don’t Go

Maybe it’s the “terrible twos” but these days, the Little Monkey and I struggle to survive a trip to the grocery store without a meltdown.  We were fine in the grocery store while he was young enough to just sleep.  We were still fine once he graduated to sitting in the cart.  Which he loved by the way.  I’d spin him around and play race car.  We were all good until he became a confident walker with a fiercely independent streak.  Now, he doesn’t want to sit in the cart, he wants to walk around the store on his own.

We’ve tried this.  This sometimes works if I’ve got a short list of items to buy.  More often, it results in him running at full speed away from me down the aisles.  Then, as I gather him back up, this leads to him lying on the floor screaming in the produce aisle having a full on tantrum.  And god forbid there’s a long line at the checkout.

I try to stay calm, I try to let him have his tantrum, I try to reason with him.  But, I end up stressed out and frazzled.  And, on many occasions, my response to this has been to turn and flee.  I have abandoned a cart full of groceries just to get out of the situation rather than continue to have people in the shop stare at me and my screaming child.  This does not help me put food on the table.

Enter Ocado.  Ocado lets me order my groceries online and have them delivered to my house, to my kitchen counter even.  They’re not the only store that does this but I chose them because

  • they offer groceries from Waitrose (arguably the quality leader in the UK),
  • they price match with Tesco,
  • and, my favorite bit of all, they have a brilliant iPhone app (free from the App Store).

On the Ocado iPhone app I can create running lists of items I need, search the product catalogue, order and book deliveries.  It keeps track of my favorites and things I order regularly and it syncs all of this automatically with the web-based app.  But hands down my favorite feature of the iPhone app is the barcode scanner.  Just used the last bit of butter?  Simply scan the barcode of the container and it automatically adds that item to your shopping basket.  Brilliant.  Why on earth has it taken me so long to sign up to do this?  The amount of stress I’ve eliminated from my life by not having to do a weekly shop with my toddler in tow is amazing.

So does the thought of taking your toddler grocery shopping leave you in a cold sweat?  Get thee to Ocado (or any online grocer).

November 10, 2011
Mercaptopurine
Motherhood

My Parenting Fail: The Importance of Keeping Medicine Out of Reach

When you become a parent, one of the things you worry about, especially as your child gets mobile, is the safety of the surroundings in your home. You put plugs in the outlets, latches on the cabinets, move the cleaning products and sharp kitchen knives out of reach. Most of this is common sense. You also fundamentally know that you should keep all medicines out of reach.  Toddlers are lightening fast and are sure to taste anything, like sharks who take a quick little nibble of something to see if it’s food they like before digging in.

And, this is where I have failed. I have Crohn’s disease and take medicine, strong medicine, every day. And, I failed to keep it out of my child’s reach.  As I’m brushing my teeth one morning a few weeks ago, my child comes back into the bathroom and opens his mouth to show me his “food” which consists of several of my pills.  My heart sinks.  I get whatever I can get out of his mouth.  I then go to find the bottle, which he has emptied all over his bed.  My heart sinks further.

How could I have been so negligent?  Was it my lack of morning coffee that caused me to leave the bottle in reach, child safety cap not secure?  All it took was a moment of distraction for him to grab it and then go forth and investigate his new-found toy.

I suspect that he didn’t actually swallow any but I know from what I saw in his mouth he chewed at least 2-3 tablets. Some of these bits of partly chewed pills I was able to get out of his mouth.  As I am panicking, my child meanwhile is fine, eating normally, playing normally, as if nothing has happened.  But because I’m not certain what he swallowed and the results of my quick Google search of the medicine’s effect on children were disconcerting, we head to the emergency room.  This, I’m sure is only the first of such trips we’ll take during his childhood.   Of course as this was peak morning travel time, it took us about an hour to travel the 8 miles to the hospital. Bloody Oxford traffic.

Unlike my experience at the dentist, the ER is well prepared for kids and for them to be there for extended periods of time.  The special playroom in the children’s ward was so full of toys I think the Little Monkey just thought we’d gone to a special playgroup for the day.  And, I mean THE DAY as we were there for about six hours.  Mostly, we spend the six hours waiting around.  Partly, for him to be there long enough for the doctors to observe him, partly to wait for his “magic gloves” to work (anesthetic cream applied to his hands to numb the pain of needles), and partly, because that’s just how an ER works.  I learn there are people who work there whose actual job title is “Play Therapist” and their job is to distract your child from the fact that someone is inserting a needle into one of their veins. On this occasion, she was blowing bubbles for his entertainment.  How do I get a job that involves blowing bubbles?  Wait, as a parent, I have that.  How do I get a PAYING job that involves blowing bubbles?

In the end, my child was normal, his tests all normal, but, given the nature of the medicine and that we had no idea how many he may have had, I’m told that I’ll have to take him for blood tests once a week for the next three weeks.  And, I’ll have to bring a urine sample along for these visits.  The nurse hands me cups in which to collect this.  Wee in a cup?  My child can’t wee in the toilet.  She suggests that I hold the cup over his private parts while I read him a story.  Like he’s going to sit still for that as if this is normally how we read together?  I give it a go the first week but show up empty-handed.  Luckily, they have an alternate method for kids that aren’t potty trained which involves placing what I would describe as a large sanitary napkin in their nappy and then extracting the urine out of it with a syringe.  All very fun indeed, but successful.

So we make three more trips to the hospital.  We get more “magic gloves” but also “magic elbow pads” and even “magic socks.”  And, each time I am grateful that all that’s come out of this experience for my child are a few needle sticks.  It could have been much worse.  I look around at the other parents in the waiting room, there for things far more serious and I am thankful that my child is healthy and happy.

For me, what’s come out of this is a hard lesson learned.  It’s terrible enough when something happens to your child but it’s made even worse if it’s as a result of something you did and could have prevented.  Kids encounter enough dangers in the world today so be diligent about protecting yours from your own stupidity.  Keep the medicine way up in the cabinet and secure the bloody safety cap!

November 4, 2011
Toothbrush
Motherhood

The Dentist is Not in the Circle of Trust

Sometimes you try to do the right thing even though you know it will be a ridiculous exercise. So, following all the recommended guidelines, I took my two-year old child to see the dentist for the first time last week. And, the fact that it did not end in a fit of tears (from either of us) means that it actually turned out better than I expected.

It was however, far from a success. Despite the dentist’s kind demeanor, Little Monkey kept his distance. Head down, furrowed brow, mouth like this…

Wrench

After a few minutes of unsuccessfully trying to coax him into opening his mouth, the dentist and I agreed to call this visit a wash. Plan B involves trying again in another few months and continuing to take him regularly until he gets comfortable enough to open his mouth. Of course, sixty seconds after walking out the door, the Little Monkey is all chatty again and opens his mouth wide as he can to utter shrieks of joy.

I’ve been to two different dental practices now in the UK and they could definitely learn a few things from their American colleagues about making the dentist office an inviting place to go. Especially for kids. Nothing says danger to a toddler like an incredibly sterile environment full of medical equipment and devoid of anything resembling fun. Want to encourage kids to go to the dentist? Have a play area, get some toys and games, make it colorful and fun.

And, if you know of such a dental practice that caters to kids in the Oxfordshire area, please leave a comment. I’d love to find out that such a thing exists.

November 3, 2011
Little Boy Dreaming
Motherhood

Top Tips for Air Travel with a Toddler

Undertaking air travel with a toddler in tow can be a stressful.  Just last week, the Little Monkey and I completed the trans-atlantic journey to visit family in America.  I’d avoid this if I could but the reality is that when you live on an island, it’s pretty difficult not to get on an airplane if you want to travel.  And if your family lives 3000 miles away across an ocean, it’s not just difficult, it’s impossible.  OK, I could take a boat but let’s be realistic.  We’ve still got the return journey to complete (assuming that England is still a democratic state to which I can return), but here’s what I’ve learned so far.

  1. Pack more than one pair of extra clothes for your child.

    You never know when your toddler will have an explosive poo.  In our case it was before we even boarded the plane at Heathrow.  I made the call that the trash bin at Heathrow was a better place for the offending clothes then in my carry on bag.  This also meant that if we had another incident in our 14 hour journey, he’d have to travel naked.

  2. Bring your own entertainment.

    Now I’d packed a few books and crayons and puzzles and things that I thought might keep my child entertained for the long journey.  But I had thought that we’d spend at least part the time watching whatever cartoons and kids movies were available on the flight.  That is until they announced that the in flight entertainment system was broken.  Good god!  You mean I’ve got to keep a two-year old entertained for seven hours in a confined space without TV?  Thankfully, I had the foresight to copy a few videos onto my iPhone (further evidence that this is the greatest device ever invented) and let’s just say it was a good thing I did or there would have been a mutiny.

  3. Plan ahead for the security checkpoint(s).

    If your child has a favorite toy that they cling to for comfort, be creative and figure out how to get this away from them before security.  Prying Mr. Zebra away and waiting for him to come out the other side of the x-ray machine is not fun.  And, TSA, toddler shoes, really?  I appreciate that we’re all security conscious these days but requiring already stressed out parents to remove their toddler’s shoes is a little overkill.  Particularly considering that said toddler had already been through security clearance 9 hours earlier with the shoes on.

  4. Give yourself permission to break the rules.

    Your child will not eat when they should or sleep when they should.  While the long haul part of our journey covered what normally would have been my child’s bedtime, he could not have been less interested in sleep.  And you never know when you’ll be spending and extra hour killing time in Newark (on top of the two you had planned) waiting for a crew to man your connecting flight. Excessive Peppa Pig watching was allowed and foods entered my child’s mouth that he doesn’t come anywhere near at home.  I was just glad to get him to eat something.  So relax and go with the flow.

  5. Cover their ears in the toilet.

    Really.  I had never thought about how loud the whoosh of an airplane toilet flushing is.  And, with me and the Little Monkey on our own, he had no choice but to accompany me into the loo.  The noise scared him to death the first time.  The second time we planned ahead and did earmuffs.

Here’s looking forward to the lessons I’ll learn on the return flight!

August 3, 2011